Kiss my ass:

Doctors suck real bad.
In case you haven't been paying attention, I am sick. I have been sick for about 2 weeks now. I finally broke down and went to see a doctor last week, which I really don't do unless my anus has exploded or I vomited up my last kidney.
So I went and the doctor gave me some anti-biotics and made me get a blood test. ( I think it was to make sure I could still feel pain.) I FUCKING HATE NEEDLES. They are sick and gross and sick and fucking gross. "NO, I'm sorry nurse, I can't follow you because I don't want your god damned needle shoved in my fucking arm, and NO, I don't want you to take the mere thing that keeps me alive and warm."

So I took the damn mold pills and my cold went away. Yes, it did. "So Jenn, why are you still bitching?"becauseimfemale

I'm bitching because I still have some sort of malaria cough that won't go away. It's a painless but annoying thing that fell in love with my chest and doesn't want to go away. You can tell it's a male strain of malaria cough.

Words of the doctor: "Take these pills, and if you're not 100% better in a week, come back and I'll see what's wrong."
Being the sweetheart that I am, I did just that.

I sat in the fucking waiting room for an hour, and I sat in his office for another 20 minutes before he even talked to me.
Which is all he did.

My visit lasted 0.000078 seconds. I told him my cough wasn't going away and I wasn't feeling "100% better" and that people at work are bitching about me coughing on their fucking greaseballs. He said, "You're better right? Come back in on the 20th and if you are still coughing I'll see what I can do."
Towards the end of our brief talk I asked him what the results of my blood test were (and what the hell they were supposed to do) and I got, "Nothing. It's nothing. Have a good day!"

I grumbled a "fucking motherfucker fuck you, you fucker. good fucking day." and left.
So, by process of elimination... I'm dying, and contagious. In fact just by reading this I've probably infected you.

"Have a good day!"